The late philosopher Marshall McLuhan was famous for saying “The medium is the message,” meaning that the technology used to convey ideas is more important, from a cultural standpoint, than the ideas themselves. 

McLuhan used a lightbulb as an example of how the medium of technology could message a whole culture or even a whole species.  A lightbulb doesn’t have content like a newspaper does.  But the fact that it can illuminate dwellings and factories at night shifted the work and social habits of untold millions of people.  It caused a massive shift in the way we conducted ourselves as human beings.

In his groundbreaking book Understanding Media, McLuhan separated media into either “hot” or “cold.”  He saw film shown in theatres, for instance, as a hot medium, calling for little audience participation, since the experience is so enveloping—with high intensity images, a captivating soundtrack, little light and few distractions.

Television, he argued, was a disruptive “cold” medium that required human beings to unconsciously assemble the myriad pixels that comprise a television image, thus compelling them to join themselves to the technology.  Moreover, lots might be happening while a television was broadcasting programs into a home, requiring the viewer to work to focus on the relatively small screen. 

Cold media, McLuhan explained, were the ones that risked human beings becoming addicted to them and feeling absorbed and homogenized by them.  He theorized that the species would fight back against this absorption and homogenization by becoming more tribal — asserting their national and geopolitical identities through conflict with one another. The Cold War between the Soviet Union and the United States may, in fact, have been partly fueled by the threat that television would dissolve everyone, and all identities, into it.

McLuhan, who died in 1980, had no idea that new technologies, like the internet and its children, Facebook, Amazon, Apple and Google, would represent an exponential, existential threat of the same kind. Writers for the Washington Post, the New York Times and other publications are only now addressing the problem I identified several years ago: that these new technologies don’t really reinforce individuality and self-expression and identity; they threaten to obliterate it instead.

How? Facebook, Amazon, Apple, Google and others seek to monopolize information dissemination and product marketing. They do so by absorbing consumers’ likes, dislikes and patterns of behavior into their sites and hardware, forcing interactions with them by spitting back marketing and social networking prompts and algorithms that trigger more searches, more buying, more socializing and more fingerprinting of the consumers’ inclinations and intentions. Once the consumers are known sufficiently, it could be argued that their psychological DNA “exists” inside the technologies behind such sites and products. The consumers are owned and operated, to an extent, by the media and technology they are using to learn, shop and socialize.

They are “connecting” to the amoeba of a technological society and disconnecting from themselves.

Just as lots of people consciously enjoy using heroin, people may consciously enjoy being depersonalized by technology. But human beings have a safety valve inside their psyches to prevent complete destruction of their free will. This unconscious reflex reasserts their identities, often — as McLuhan observed and predicted — through heightened tribal conflict.

McLuhan no doubt would have assigned the rancor between right-wing Americans and left-wing Americans, the divide between Black Lives Matter and All Lives Matter, the rise of ISIS and of MeToo (equally dangerous, by the way), the feverish tension between the U.S. and North Korea and, yes, the rising tensions between Nato and Russia to the impact of the internet and its offspring.  And it isn’t too much to think that he might well have been correct.

Our species, save for some pockets of resistance like the Amish, has rushed headfirst into our new technologies. But our souls won’t rush into that dark night without a fight. Lots of fights. Maybe even nuclear war. Literally.                    

Dr. Keith Ablow

How many stories have we all told that include the line, “Then, this completely amazing thing happened.”  There are variations, of course:  “Then, you won’t believe what happened;” or “Then, everything changed, out of the blue.”

Life surprises us—often with a great turn of events.  We couldn’t see it coming, yet it must have been woven into the narrative that was unfolding before it, or it would never come to pass.

“I figured we were looking at another disappointing year of revenue, but, then, everything changed out of the blue.”

“I had just pretty much concluded I would be alone for the rest of my life when . . . this completely amazing thing happened.” 

“I could never have predicted what happened next.”

Yet, no matter how many time life surprises us with relief or success, we still seem amazed the next time it does.  Maybe it would be wise, then, to keep our eyes open for turnaround moments, at every moment—especially the dark ones.

I am not arguing for pie-in-the-sky thinking or putting on rose-colored glasses.  Seeing things for what they are is crucial.  But, one of the ways things are is unpredictable.  And one of the unpredictable elements of any story is that unexpected great turn of events.  So, shouldn’t we be alert for that kind of event unfolding?  Shouldn’t we even expect it to unfold?  

I believe we should.  I believe that expecting a sudden, positive turn of events amidst adversity allows us to detect hints of such a turn of events sooner and take advantage of them more readily.  It also may be that expecting “better” somehow helps manifest it—if through no other means than allowing you to project confidence when you might, otherwise, not.  

“Then, this completely amazing thing happened,” is a close cousin of, “It ain’t over ‘til the fat lady sings.”  But it takes things one step further.  It not only argues that we should allow for positive events, but also that we should look for them.

Finally, there’s a kind of reverse engineering that I sometimes advise.  Think to yourself, “If something were to occur to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat, in this situation, what would it be?”  Then, go down the path of searching for that very event—a new investor for your startup, a new medicine for your health problem, a new defender and friend when the chips are down. 

True, the most amazing things happen when least expected, but that’s only because our faith falters.  If you can maintain faith, even in dark hours, the light may well burn brightly—and, sooner, rather than later.

Dr. Keith Ablow

Fiction is the domain of novels and screenplays, but it has a way of slipping into other creative pursuits, like planning entrepreneurial endeavors and evaluating our businesses, as well as planning and evaluating our lives.

The reason for this potential slippage — which can cause us to put less than solidly-factual and rational foundations under what we build — is probably partly neurological. We human beings are moved by the energy that fiction can kindle. Creative, but reality-based imagination probably requires the activation of nerve centers in the brain that flirt with those that generate pure make-believe.

Remember back to when we were kids and used to play at being princes and princesses? We didn’t need lots of rehearsals to “memorize our lines.” We came up with them on the fly. It was easy to slip the bindings of our life stories and playact with abandon. That’s a strength we have as human beings — and it is a potential weakness.

In the realm of creating fiction we are free to take big leaps toward our dreams and to imagine meeting our goals without the intrusion of realities that would slow us down or weigh us down. There is a dashed line that connects the notion of raising large sums of capital for a limited idea and morphing into a superhero and winning the day, against all the odds. Our minds are capable of suspending disbelief and being recruited into illusions that make us feel magical.

In the realm of imagination that serves the creation of non-fiction — like a real business or real preparation for a career — there are realities that must be respected. There are hurdles that — properly — weigh down those huge leaps we can take toward imagining the fulfillment of our dreams. There are troubling details that make us check our compelling ideas to make sure they are worthy ideas.

This is why working on oneSELF is so important to the creation of an inspiring non-fiction project, of any kind. Because the creator must be as expansive in his or her thinking as possible, yet as invulnerable as possible to slipping into fantasy. We can never get lost in a “role” and lose ourSELVES. True and strong foundations must be built, even for very moving projects. And here’s the key: If the creator has developed a habit of avoiding the painful paragraphs or pages or chapters in his or her own life story then he or she will be more prone to avoiding the painful, often solvable problems with whatever they plan.

The strongest leaders of creative projects have powerful imaginations, yet remain grounded. They aren’t people who have been trained to avoid the tough realities of their own narratives or the non-fiction versions of their projects. They aren’t seeking to escape reality; they are seeking to improve it.

To solve problems, they must be seen. That’s why the imaginative, non-fiction thinker and doer in business (or in any endeavor) is a transformational thinker, not a Transformer of the fictional, superhero variety.

Dr. Keith Ablow

There is one truth about leadership that will never fail those who understand it and adhere to it.  Leaders who see light, even amidst what might seem like complete darkness, will always be those who inspire others and who reach higher goals.

Any amount of competition, any market forces, any geopolitical realities, any set of hurdles in a family, any health challenges are best approached with rock-solid conviction that events will, ultimately, unfold for the better.  The universe is neither random nor vengeful.  What is unfolding before you is an opportunity, but you must choose to see it as such.

Is this true when an onslaught of negative factors coalesces to challenge the future of a business?  It certainly is, as long as the leader of that business interprets those factors as purifying and strengthening himself or herself, his or her team and the intentions of both. 

In order to maintain this ability to see light in nearly complete darkness, one must believe, deep in one’s heart, that the light is, in fact, there—obscured, but present.  And one must be willing to tolerate pain on the way to revealing and accessing that reservoir of power.  Steeling oneself for a journey through darkness is always wise. 

The great leader is convinced not only that gifts are wrapped in challenges, not only that getting to the gifts may require sacrifice, but also that he or she is the one destined to be confronting those very challenges at the very time they appear.  This does away—properly—with the natural anxiety that significant challenges provoke.  A sense of manifest destiny is the soul’s answer to what may, otherwise, be perceived as Shakespeare’s slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

Communicating this sense of manifest destiny to others is key to the ability to lead.  It should become contagious, in order to sweep through the shadows.  It is a remarkable quality of the human mind that its energy can be kindled by the mental energy of another. 

Dr. Keith Ablow

I think in narrative form.  I have a sixth sense for how stories develop—what propels them forward, which paragraphs or pages contribute to the authentic spine of the story and which  paragraphs or pages miss the mark and do no service to the whole.  That’s the reason for any value I bring to helping people reclaim their true selves, any facility I have writing novels and any foresight I lend to thinking through business plans.  These seemingly different efforts are really one: seeing a story for what it is and what it can be.

Now, onto Volodymyr Zelenskyy.  I believe we are watching the rise of a transformational figure in world history.  The way I see it, the evidence is so overwhelming that to not note it would be a form of denying it.  

First of all, Zelenskky is leading a David versus Goliath battle.  The forces of Ukraine were predicted to fall weeks ago, in the face of overwhelming Russian military might.  But they haven’t.  And that is due, in no small part, to the way that Zelenskyy has galvanized Ukranian resistance with his determination, defiance and political acumen.  His grace under pressure is, in fact, almost inexplicable.  He refused to take America up on an invitation to be evacuated from Ukraine with his family, reportedly saying, “The fight is here.  I need ammunition, not a ride.”  He has said he is afraid of nothing.  He has remained in Kyiv, in his office and on the streets, rallying Ukranians and appealing to the hearts and minds of human beings all over the world—for humanity and justice.

No doubt many of you reading this piece sense where I am going with it.  And I am aware that part of me is resisting where the sentences are leading me.  So, I will pose my thoughts as questions:  How does one know when a man rises beyond what can be explained and begins working miracles?  How would one know if a man’s very existence were miraculous?  Is such an assessment made during his life or only after his death? 

I ask these questions because I am also a student of synchronicity.  I don’t think events unfold in a random way and I don’t like to ignore what others might say are “coincidences.”  Here are a few:  A Jewish leader named Zelenskyy is displaying what some would call miraculous courage in Ukraine.  It is in the book of Zechariah, written some 500 years before the birth of Christ, that prophesies about the Messiah, who will usher in a realignment of nations and ensuing world peace, are presented.  The tanks sent to oppose Zelenskky were emblazoned with the letter “Z” by Vladimir Putin’s regime.  What were they sent to destroy?  A man?  A movement?  A messiah?

I present these facts and themes so that others, more steeped than I in biblical prophesies can  wrestle with them, or quickly dispense with them.  

There, I wrote it.  I nearly didn’t.  But, I felt compelled to.

Dr. Keith Ablow 

First of all, it’s best to admit that not all of you wants to stop smoking.  Otherwise, you already would have.  Part of you certainly does—the wise part that knows that taking the risk of dying from lung cancer is no way to behave.  But another part of you isn’t going along with that reasoning.  And that part of you seems to be in control.  

This way of thinking about an addiction or habit—any addiction or habit—is far more powerful than assigning responsibility to your DNA.  Whether or not you enjoy tobacco or nicotine more than others do is really irrelevant, after all.  Whether or not some part of your brain tends to have more activity in it when performing repetitive actions like smoking doesn’t really matter.  Because I promise you there is no DNA sequence that makes quitting cigarettes impossible.  Hence, you are the thing in your way.  But not all of you.

Again, it’s best to admit that you aren’t of one mind, at all.  Part of you wants to quit.  Part of you wants to smoke.  It feels good, or it relieves stress, or whatever.  So, the key is to appoint the sensible supervisor inside you as “in charge.”  You’re going to have to take control of the rogue, slowly suicidal or hedonistic-tobacco-puffing you.

I’ve made this point before, but I will, again, here:  You should talk to yourSELF.  Give your Supervisor Self a voice.  Maybe he or she tells your Smoking Self, “Look, I know you want to go buy cigarettes.  I get it.  You’re anxious.  You can even tell me what’s making you anxious or how it feels.  But we aren’t buying cigarettes, period.  It isn’t happening.  We’re not going to be one of those people who quits after a heart attack or a lung tumor.  So, start talking.  I’ll listen.  But I won’t buy us cigarettes.”

Sounds crazy, right.  Well, it isn’t.  Because you have a Benedict Arnold inside you, obviously, and ignoring that fact might well cost you your life.  So, you had better take control.  And if the tone that I have suggested with the Smoking Self sounds a lot like talking to a child, there may be a reason for that.  Cigarettes are a lot like pacifiers.  Cigarettes are a lot like nursing.  Cigarettes are a way to self-soothe, maybe because you never were soothed by those around you.  

Forget all that Freudian stuff, though.  Grow up.  Just take control of the spoiled brat who wants to suck down some smoke.  Get mad at him, if you have to.  Don’t be afraid to use a few obscenities.  “Fuck you, if you think you’re going to kill us.”  Hey, listen:  Your life is at stake.  It isn’t time for pleasantries.

Many, many of us have self-destructive patterns.  And it isn’t a great idea to think of them as “tendencies,” either.  They aren’t.  They’re more fully formed than that.  They’re much more like walled off, separate, self-destructive components of ourselves (plural, intended) that need to be understood, but also aggressively contained.  Your smoking self is Vladimir Putin, burning your good self down.

By the way, the same is true for the parts of us that are trying to kill us by overeating or by drinking too much alcohol or by gambling away our hard-earned money.

Is it painful to take control away from those parts of ourselves?  You bet it is.  Will it make us more powerful?  No question at all.

Dr. Keith Ablow